June 2011
25 posts
4 tags
I'm On The Top Of The World Tonight
Been doing wonderful these past days I’ve been out of the hospital, have had no slips ups and have exercised everyday. I lost the 2 pounds I gained in the hospital. :) Fuckkk yes.
Bad news, weigh in tomorrow. Kill meee.
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Anonymous asked: hi do you think you can post a picture of yourself?
Reblog if you are "normal weight" for your height...
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I'm Not Going To Back Down
No more excuses, food will no longer control me. I will not be a slave to my body. I am in control.
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Finally Out Of Hell
I get discharged from the hospital tomorrow ! So excited, finally get to be at home, work, hangout with friends and concentrate on getting skinny ! Whoop. Has been the longest 2 weeks ever.. never ever going back there again. I will be posting a lot more often :) Good to be back, missed you all xx.
6 tags
Kill Me Now?
I’m sorry to all my followers! I got admitted to the hospital and I’m not allowed any cellphone or electronic devices. It’s absolute hell in here and I have no freedom and no control over anything! I’ve been in here for 6 days and it feels like I’ve been in here for at least 2 weeks. I’m hoping to get out soon as I can’t stand it! I will have to get back...
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Blaggh.
I just took 6 laxatives and 3 internal fat flush/colon cleanser pills. Oh, if my parents found out, they’d kill me.
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I'm Nervous
Tomorrow I go again for my weekly weigh in and all that. There thinking about admitting me as an in patient at the hospital and I’m freaking out. No cell phones, no flushing your own toilet, no showers alone. This is going to be hell. But I’m so out of control. So lost.
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Anonymous asked: WHEN DID YOU KNOW WHEN YOU HAD ED.??
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I've Hit Rock Bottom
Binge after binge, I’m so fed up with this body I live in. I’m disgusted and sickened every time I see my reflection in the mirror. The voices in my head are getting louder and I’ve completely lost all control.
8 tags
So Far So Good
Calorie intake is 730 as of now, all healthy :)
Burned 450 calories working out in gym.
Going to a kickboxing class tonight to burn some more calories.
Today has been a good day !
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8 tags
Good Day Minus The Binge..
After working out for 2 hours and 20 minutes on a combination of the elliptical, stair climber and stationary bike I managed to burn 1150 calories. Now that’s an accomplishment I can be proud of. :)
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Truth is...
when I binge, I feel so disgusted with myself that I won’t even allow myself to look at thinspirational pictures or the mirror.
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This Neverending Cycle
This is what my life consists of:
Binging
Purging
Restricting
Eating Normal and Exercising
Giving Up
Abusing Laxatives
Colon Cleansers
Binging
Purging
Restricting
Repeat
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Uggh.
Doctors tomorrow = weekly weigh in, heart measurements and strict talking about how what I’m doing is killing me. I know all the dangerous things that can happen, but yet I ignore it and continue with it. Now I’m just scared they will put me as an in patient at the hospital… fml.
9 tags
“I’m a complete mess.”
