March 2012
40 posts
phoenix-fires asked: Talk to me dear, please.. whats ailing you?
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I Sometimes Just Want to Run Away
My bulimia has been getting really bad. I’ve been restricting and then binging and purging everyday. I’ve been b/p 2-3 times a day. This morning I woke up and it felt like someone was stabbing a knife into my heart and it hurt to breathe. I don’t know what to do. The voice in my head is so strong. I’ve been drinking a lot during the weekends just to try and numb myself. My...
Anonymous asked: when were you at your hw/sw? do you have any pictures
itsfixedbutstillbroken-deactiva asked: I wish you could see you as I see you x Absolutely perfect in everyway xx
So after reading Tumblr's new policy update...
revengeofthejenn:
I just wanted to clarify that I do not support any kind of self-harm. My struggles are my own, and I do not wish anything like this for others. I post how -I- feel, and by no means am attempting to influence others to do the same.
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Why Do I Always End Up Here? :(
Idk why but every time I get to 121-122 pounds I just think I can eat whatever and not have it have an effect on me. So pretty sure I’m back up to 124.. I don’t want to weigh for a while. I’m just trying to focus on no binging/purging. Today is my second day without b/p and I hope I can keep going because I hate it so so much. Ate around 1300 calories yesterday and I’m at...
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Omfg.
I literally almost died yesterday. I flipped my car onto it’s roof. I’m still shaken up about it all. The police said I’m lucky to be alive and that I should be dead right now. Scariest moment of my life. My whole life flashed and I thought I was going to die. I’m not driving for a while.
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I Hate My Life
Binged twice, and purged. I’m going crazy. I don’t know what my weight is.
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Failure.
Today I had a small banana (80) and a grapefruit (120) so 200 calories. Then I got home binged and purged.. and then I slept, woke up had 2 apples (220) and then I binged and purged again. Around 500 calories stayed down. My throat is raw, and once again I’m a failure as always.
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FUCK.
I caved and ate. I want to die. Restricting tons this week. I hate myself so much right now. So depressed. Fuck.
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fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck
Yesterday night, I got so so many 5 cent candies :( Then this morning I weighed 123. No way I ate 7000 calories though. I looked it up to make sure, and sugar retains water. Fuck I hate that. Today is my birthday supper. I’m freaking out, I don’t know how I will resist.
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A Not So Okay Day :/
I was at 410 calories, b/p twice, I got as much out as I could. No idea what my calories are at. Making sure I eat a lot less tomorrow. Going to start watching Supersize vs. Superskinny, should give me some pure motivation. Also weigh in is tomorrow.. god help me I’ve lost weight or I might go insane.
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Sometimes I Feel Like Alice In Wonderland Chasing...
Started pills and packet stuff today, appetite is gone. It’s 5:45 pm here and I’m at 310 calories. Bad thing is I’m feeling dizzy and sick. Maybe I should eat a little something.. but then maybe I shouldn’t? I know my body needs the food, but at the same time my ed is screaming not to eat anything.
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sarahfrancesyoung asked: You are actually extremely beautiful. Why do you want to lose weight, you actually are absolutely gorgeous?
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This Better Be Worth It !
I just bought 100 dollars worth of weightloss supplements. Call me crazy, but this is how much I want to lose weight. This is what I bought :
2 Bottles of Hoodia Gordonii (supresses appetite)
1 Bottle of Abs+ (weightloss and aimed to shrink your waist)
1 Bottle Crave-Free (reduces cravings for carbs)
1 Container go4trim (makes you feel full, speeds up metabolism and fat burning)
I really...
